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- Top Ten Doormen Pet Peeves During The Blizzard
- (Presented by actual New York City Doormen)
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- 10. Hard to give cabbies the finger with mittens on.
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- 9. Giants fans who throw snowballs at you.
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- 8. When the snow is blowing so hard you have to wear pants.
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- 7. Local punks stealing my hat for their snowman.
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- 6. The fire hydrants are all buried so the dogs use me.
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- 5. Frozen knobs
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- 4. Snow or no snow, they make me wear this stupid freakin' uniform
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- 3. When Geraldo makes me break the icicles off his mustache.
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- 2. People who ask, "Can you hail me a hooker?"
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- 1. When you ask Letterman for a tip, he says, "Stay out of the cold."
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- Letterman, Tuesday, January 9, 1996
- ) 1996 Worldwide Pants, Incorporated. All Rights Reserved
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